~5 min read
Mt 18:21-22 – The context here is personal forgiveness, and not forgiveness adjudicated by the church. In Rabbinic discussion, forgiving someone 3 times was considered the limit, with no forgiveness beginning the fourth offense. Peter thought himself quite magnanimous for proposing to forgive 7 times which is more than double the Rabbinic figure. 70 x 7 says Jesus. He is not teaching that forgiveness is completely unqualified or that there is a precise number or upper limit. Rather He is teaching that forgiveness cannot be limited by frequency or quantity.
Note the steps in vv. 15-20 in the Messianic community for dealing with the offenses of a sinning brother. 1) Confront the sinning brother privately, with gentleness, showing him his fault. This is not to gain points. It is designed to win him over, for redemptive purposes—it can be very hard to receive a rebuke, even in private one and harder to administer one in loving humility. 2) If he rejects the correction, take 2 or 3 witnesses with you, so that there is a united testimony. Christ promises to attend the prayerful, considered judgment of His people. 3.) If he rejects this testimony, he is to be regarded as a pagan or a tax gatherer. In other words, he is not to be forgiven and restored; the church has solemnly convened; he is to be excommunicated. These are steps or conditions given by our Savior regarding forgiveness.
Mt 18:23-27 – Jesus has been addressing the question of repeated personal forgiveness. Failure to forgive is radically inconsistent with a Kingdom (of heaven) made up of those forgiven by their King. Those who refuse to forgive will be excluded from the Kingdom.
For reference on 10,000 talents, King David donated 3000 talents of gold and 10,000 talents of silver for the construction of the temple (1 Chron 29:4, 7). The price of selling a family into slavery was one talent of silver. Estimates 10,000 talents of silver: 10 million to 3 billion. Or, 150,000 year’s wages.
The king has pity on his servant’s plight. He promises to cancel his mountainous debt— choosing to look on the loss as a bad loan rather than what it probably was: embezzlement.
Mt. 18:28-31 – The appalling attitude of the servant comes to light. A fellow slave owed him 100 denarii, equivalent to 100 days wages of a foot soldier or common laborer. It was not insignificant, but trivial compared to what had been forgiven him. The plea made by the debtor, his fellow servant did not move him to compassion. He had him thrown into debtor’s prison. It was illegal to sell a man for a sum greater than the debt he owed.
The other servants are distressed by what they witness. So, they tell their master everything about the ungrateful slave’s inequity.
Mt 18:28-35 – The king now calls the forgiven servant, ‘wicked’. He forgoes selling him, but does hand him over to the torturers until he pays back what he owes—which he never can do in one lifetime. Jesus is graphically showing the perversity of the slave’s actions. “Jesus sees no incongruity in a Heavenly Father who forgives so bountifully and punishes so ruthlessly, and neither should we” (Don Carson). He is a God of compassion and mercy toward those who believe the gospel and repent of their sins.
He cannot receive into His eternal kingdom one who is devoid of compassion and mercy. No one earns His mercy; in this parable, the servant is granted mercy by virtue of the forgiving nature of the king. Those who are forgiven must forgive les they show themselves incapable of receiving forgiveness.
- Forgiveness does not mean that you cannot set a boundary with the offender. EX. In a carpool of Christian business men, a brother who is perpetually late has reached a point in his habitual tardiness that is jeopardizing the jobs of his fellow riders. Is it biblical to warn him that if he continues to be late he must find another way to work? EX. Your Christian babysitter takes your twins toddlers for a drive, runs quickly into to Walmart for an item, meets an old friend inside, talks too long, and the twins left in the hot car are ultimately hospitalized in bad shape, she asks forgiveness. Does that mean you are obligated to keep her as your sitter? EX. What about a Christian contractor who cuts corners—is negligent, who hires unlicensed subs’, etc.
- Forgiveness does not forbid confronting, reproof, rebuke, and admonishment. “You shall not go about as a slanderer among your people, and you are not to act against the life of your neighbor; I am the LORD. ‘You shall not hate your fellow countryman in your heart; you may surely reprove your neighbor, but shall not incur sin because of him. ¹⁸ ‘You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the sons of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself; I am the LORD” (Lev 19:16-18).
- Forgiveness does not always guarantee sustained close relations with the person forgiven. Spouse, close friend, brother or sister in Christ—in those relationships, we should strive for a level of forgiveness known as exoneration. That is complete restoration, a total clearing of the slate. Renewing trust, intimacy, cooperation, love. But, where the offense is not owned by the offender, forgiveness will be accompanied by longsuffering. In other words, the relationship still exists, but the party offended who has done the forgiving ‘soldiers on’ in patience, meekness, and longsuffering. Where there is no possibility of a close relationship (a deceased offender, perpetrator of a crime, molester, drunk driver who crippled you, slanderer who wants no contact, etc.) forgiveness will be accompanied by release.
- Forgiveness does not mean that damage from a serious offense will immediately disappear. My wife and I have counseled many Christians who have been victims. I can tell you that for them, learning to trust again is a significant issue. At times, they feel that the perpetrator has damaged them for life. And, that they will carry permanently some emotional disability.
CONCLUSION: In today’s western society, the progressives tend to define a person’s liberty by personal rights (unlimited self-expression), and what they imagine they are entitled to receive. Secular psychology would add to that definition how a person has been victimized (sinned against) or what addictions they have. But in the body of Christ, our identity is established by our union with Christ. We are adopted sons and daughters of God, fellow heirs with Christ— defined not by our sin, but by what God has done with our sin (in putting it away). No wonder Jesus dined with tax-gatherers and sinners. The redeemed make up a fellowship of the forgiven who excel in forgiving others.